Why become a Coach?

You may be thinking about why it would be good for you to become a Coach. In this post I’d like to give you a few ideas and tips to consider.

You might want to start by considering what has drawn you to the idea of being a Coach first.

Are you thinking of changing careers to become a full time Coach?


Thinking about Coaching part time while you work in another job?


Do you want to use Coaching skills in your normal day job?

Or do you have another motivation?

Whatever you reason some benefits when you become a Coach fit any of the above. Coaching is a powerful way of helping others and making a real difference. You will have the satisfaction of knowing that you are doing something that is worthwhile. This will give you both job and life satisfaction.

There are additional benefits that come from this including giving you, the Coach, increased well-being and resilience. Doing work that feels meaningful is a great way to manage your mental health too.

There is another benefit that might surprise you. When you work as a Coach you learn a lot about yourself. Why is that useful? Well, you will find you get better at communication with family, friends and others. As these skills improve you will find life calm and balanced because great communication skills are a super-power to manage relationships.

You may also start to recognise your own triggers and as your self awareness grows feel more in control increasing your general happiness in life.

If you want to be a full time Coach or even a part time one there are some great benefits for you in how you work. You can fit a coaching practice around your life choosing when you work. This flexibility is one of the best things about being freelance.

Many people start part time and build up their business before leaving their day job. You can do that too and keep financial security while you get going.

If you are more interested in becoming a coach to help in your day job all the benefits about making a difference and the personal goodies still apply. In addition you will be adding a skill set that really lifts your game in the work place.

If your company has an inhouse coaching culture you will be demonstrating a commitment by gaining the skills yourself. If you have a Coaching Diploma it will also look great on your CV.

Coaching styles in leadership are seen as both positive and effective. If you bring this approach to the workplace you will see improvements in communication, influence, cooperation, team work and productivity.

I wonder what other benefits you have read about or even experienced that I didn’t include above. Do add your experience of Coaching in the comments.

If you want to have a free chat to discuss your Coaching pathway do contact me direct.

Become an NLP Practitioner

Why train to become an NLP Practitioner?

Those that have attended NLP courses with us have reported major paradigm shifts in their life; increasing self confidence and self esteem, zest for lifetransforming limiting beliefs to empowering beliefs and helping to communicate with others more effectively. This makes NLP Practitioner an ideal course if you are looking for personal transformation and for those of you wanting to help others you will gain an Accredited Certification that is respected globally!

As well as the immeasurable benefits you will also gain:

  • Sign up for the full NLP Practitioner including the Diploma and save £395.
  • An MP3 set of the GWiz Practitioner course.
  • Three certificates: An NLP Practitioner Certificate, an Neuro Linguistic Psychology Practitioner Certificate  from us and an NLP Practitioner Certificate from the ANLP (Association of NLP)
  • A gift of three months full Professional Membership with the ANLP (Association of NLP), worth over £130.
  • Support after the course…through:
    • our monthly NLP Coaching Circle
    • supervision and professional support (CPD)
    • free business advice and general ad hoc email support

Why complete NLP Practitioner with GWiz NLP?

Would you like to be able to help other people either at work or personally? Are you an HR or L&D Professionallooking to add more tools to your tool kit? Or maybe you are a Manager or Leader wanting to develop new ways to manage both your career and your team.

Your interest in NLP may be more personal, are you looking for ways to change how you feel about yourself?

Do you lack confidence? Maybe you feel as if you have imposter syndrome? Have you ever felt as if something was holding you back from having the kind of life you want?

Many people attend NLP Practitioner to answer these questions and resolve similar issues. One of the most surprising things about NLP Practitioner is the long term transformation that many people experience. For instance, did you know that learning NLP can transform a Fixed Mindset into a Growth Mindset?

These may be new terms to you so let me explain. If you have a Fixed Mindset you might find life challenging and be unable to make changes. It is likely that your resilience will be low and you may have issues with self-worth.

A Growth Mindset opens up new ways of thinking and problem-solving. You will be more flexible and adaptable. You will feel a greater sense of self-worth and your resilience will be strengthened. My published research provided evidence of this effect meaning that I can say with confidence that NLP can really make a difference in your life if you are ready to give it a try.

If you are thinking about training in NLP, I am guessing that you are considering carefully as this is a big investment both in terms of your time and financially.

You can start by just signing up for the Diploma on either 20th February (Zoom Version) or 13th March 2023 (in person version) for just £395. This is a good way to find out if this training is for you.

The early bird rate for NLP Practitioner is £1995, if booked and fully paid for by 31st March 2023, deposit due on application. Full rate applies from 1st April 2023, £2995.

click the link to find out more details……

NLP Diploma (in person)

Do you want to feel positive, happy and full of energy more often?

NLP is the tool that will provide you with a pathway to a new you. The “you” who makes things happen and feels ready for anything.

Find out how you can:

  • Increase your confidence and self-esteem.
  • Access states of happiness and joy more often.
  • Improve your relationships both personal and professional.
  • Communicate in a more engaging way.
  • Learn a whole new tool kit that can be used in your life and at work.
  • Perhaps even start a new career as an NLP Practitioner.
  • Start the process of training to be an NLP Trainer so you can start your own school of NLP.

NLP Diploma 

The full NLP Diploma is also module one of our fully Accredited NLP Practitioner.

On completion of your NLP Diploma you are then ready to complete our NLP Practitioner.

NLP Diploma Learning Outcomes

By applying the learning from our NLP Diploma course you will be able to:

1) Use your communication skills more effectively by developing your ability to read people

2) Describe the difference between successful and non-successful outcome setting

3) Set outcomes that compelling and well-formed

4) Make changes to your ‘internal cinema’ to transform how you respond and feel

5) Help others overcome limiting reactions and beliefs

6) Build strong positive states to apply to any situation

7) Manage your own state and the state of others more easily

All our programmes are led by Melody and Joe Cheal who are both NLP Master Trainers and regular speakers at NLP conferences. They also each have degrees and Masters degrees in Psychology and so bring a wealth of additional knowledge to their training.

The NLP Diploma is module one of the full NLP Practitioner programme. 

The GWiz NLP Practitioner is accredited with the PSiNLP and ANLP. We keep the group size to a maximum of 12-16 participants with 2 trainers because being a true participant as opposed to a member of the audience will allow you to fully learn NLP and its applications.

NLP Diploma in Person, East Sussex available 13th to 15th March 2023

Creating Coaching Contracts – Part six

The relationship contract, client’s outcomes (goals) and tasking

In my individual Supervision sessions and Supervision Groups I sometimes notice a Coach who will launch straight into the “story” they want to talk about. This is always a clue for me that we may be about to discuss “parallel processing”.

Note: Parallel processing is where a behaviour or a dynamic is mirrored in more than one level. In this case it may be the problem the Coach has brought to Supervision may be the very one they are acting out themselves with the Supervisor. The roles have moved so the Coach is acting out the Client’s behaviour inviting the Supervisor to act out the Coach’s behaviour.

When this happens I need to interrupt the Coach and remind them that in Supervision we always start with the Contract. What does the Coach want to get out of the session? What do they need from me as Supervisor? How will they know they have got what they need?

These are similar to some of the questions you may ask your clients in the Coaching session. You will clarify goals, outcomes and responsibilities as part of the session contract. When a Coach forgets to set the contract with their client or if the client launches straight into the “story” the session can often ramble, go in circles or end with little being achieved.

The skill you need to develop is the ability to interrupt your client gently and firmly so the contract can be agreed. The contract in many instances helps the client to get more focused and they may start spontaneously discovering options and solutions as they talk through outcomes and goals.

Remember last time I said the work is in the contract (thank you Julie Hay).


In the first session with a new client it is worth including some relationship contracting. Find out how much challenge your client wants and how they would like you to offer challenge. Some people prefer blunt, direct feedback and get irritated with “fluffy” feedback. Others would prefer a softer touch. I often give my clients or the Coaches I supervise a sliding scale of 1 to 10 as a subjective way to identify the level of challenge or feedback required.

I also explain about the importance of interrupting them as a tool to help them both in setting contracts and sometimes within process. I ask the client to give me permission to interrupt them and share a phrase I commonly use.

As you gain understanding of your client you will notice that some people find it easier to set goals and outcomes than others. You may need to contract the level of goal setting that works for them. For example, if we look at personality types, some like to have concrete plans while others like to keep their options open. One client may be looking for pragmatic action step facilitation while another could just as easily wish to explore an issue in order to gain insight with no specific action attached. It is worth saying the same client may vary in what approach they need depending on the context.

Tasking is a useful tool you may wish to offer your clients and this too needs contracting. Tasking involves agreeing specific actions the client will take between sessions. This may be suggesting the client research ideas, for example in my most recent Coaching Circle I tasked one Coach to look at three successful Coach profiles to model what they would like to adopt in their own business. It may be, like this example, an action specific to a goal or an outcome. Alternately, it can be interesting to suggest a metaphorical task.  For example, suggest to your client they take a walk in the park and count how many different types of trees are in it. (with metaphorical tasks we never explain the purpose, when the client returns we ask them what they noticed and what insights this gave them).

The agreement and commitment to carry out the task is contracted in the session. Do avoid using terms like “home work” as this may trigger a reaction that is unhelpful for the client. If a client does not complete tasks discussing why (without blame) can be insightful for the client. Bottom line remember tasking is designed to help the client not to please the Coach!

Next time I will introduce some tools that you as a Coach can use to develop and grow your skill set.

Creating Coaching Contracts – Part five

The importance of multi-cornered contracts

What is a multi-cornered contract?

The clue is in the name, most coaching contracts are not just between two people. The obvious parties to a contract are the Coach and the Client however there are often other stake holders.

In simplest terms ethical professional Coaches have a Supervisor and although the Supervisor does not have a direct relationship with the client they are in the contract.

As a Coach it is important you explain how Supervision works  to your Client and what boundaries are involved. This will be in particular about confidentiality. Your relationship with your Supervisor needs to be transparent for the Client. This is vital if you want to maintain trust.

I guide the Coaches I supervise to make sure they present cases anonymously and to give only as much content as needed for the supervision. As a Supervisor I will keep anything presented to me confidential particularly in cases where the client’s identity may be obvious for some reason. (most often where one student is coaching another between training modules).

The Client also needs to understand the purpose of supervision and the scope. As I also run Supervision Groups it is important that Coaches joining such groups also maintain confidentiality.

There are a number of other parties or stake holders that may need to be part of the contract. If the client is being sponsored by a family member you need to be particularly careful about defining boundaries. In such situations it might be useful to have a meeting with both Sponsor and Client to agree boundaries and how the Coaching will work. Well-meaning family members often try to push the boundaries and if you have not been clear you may end up with a mess.

Corporate Coaching also usually has additional stake holders and can become quite complex. The Client may not be directly responsible for payment so the Finance Department may become part of the contract on a practical level. Often the Learning and Development Department commission the coaching. As with the example of family above you need to clarify boundaries and requirements. This can include outcomes, scope of topics (e.g. personal life or not?), is the Client willingly signing up, what are the definitions of Coaching in the organisation, what agreements have been made with the line manager etc.

To give an example, I was commissioned by an organisation a number of years ago to work with a front-line member of staff. The scope was to help them manage emotions better. The Client was willing. Some weeks into the relationship the line manager rang me and asked me to give a report on the Client. Luckily I had been very clear in the Contracting phase with the Commissioning officer (L&D). I was able to stay firm with regard to confidentiality and refer them back to the main stake holder.

If I had not done this I could have ended up having to manage conflict and it could have damaged my reputation. The early work on cleaning up the multi-cornered contract is worth the time and it will save you a lot of heart-ache.

There are many other aspects to the multi-cornered contract and I hope this article has given you some food for thought.

As Julie Hay, one of my mentors always used to say the work is in the Contract!

What has been your experience of working with multi-cornered contracts?

Creating Coaching Contracts – Part four

Creating Client Coaching Contracts – Preventing Soft Boundaries between Coaching sessions

Last time I shared with you some thoughts about soft boundaries within coaching sessions. I promised we would look at preventing soft boundaries between sessions, so here it is.

The most common soft boundary between sessions is about contact. Many new Coaches either make themselves totally available between sessions or keep messaging clients between sessions to see how they are doing.

I want to talk to you about the second one first. You became a Coach because you care and maybe you see checking in with your client as being supportive. To some extent it is supportive however if you have not contracted between session contact it may have a different outcome.

It can go a couple of ways. If you keep checking on the client it may appear that you (the Coach) are needy. Your client may find your checking in a bother. You may even lose the client.

Alternatively, you could be setting up an over-dependency relationship. Your client may become over-attached to you and unable to function effectively without your support. The relationship will begin to blur and you could be disempowering your client.

So what about when the client is wanting contact between sessions?

Some clients may be looking for dependency and if there is no contract in place about between session contact they may ring, text, email or message you out of hours. If you have always answered right away the client may become anxious if you don’t respond to a message. Some even become angry if they perceive you have ignored them. If you have soft boundaries between sessions and have a lot of clients you could find yourself on call 24/7. It will not be good for your well-being or for your client.

You may also end up doing a lot of “free” coaching. This is not good for you business, you are entitled to be paid for your time and expertise.

Luckily the solution for this is simple. Include in your contracting clear rules about between session contact. This can include hours of business, charges for anything that takes longer than five minutes to respond to and that you may not respond right away. You can contract specific contact such as asking the client to email you their goals.

How much contact you have with clients between sessions is really up to you. If you want contact between sessions just contract it clearly. Include the medium, response times and when your office is closed.

There may be other between session boundary issues that can crop up. If you are struggling with any type of boundary issue do remember that this is the type of thing your Supervisor can help you with.

Do let me know your thoughts and contact me direct if you need support.

Creating Coaching Contracts – Part three

Preventing Soft Boundaries by Contracting your Professional Boundaries and Responsibilities

Soft boundaries are one of the most common issues my students bring to Supervision. So what is a soft boundary? A soft boundary can either be a boundary that has not been put in place or where you, the Coach, allow the client to ignore a boundary.

There are two types of boundary to consider, boundaries within the coaching sessions and boundaries between sessions. They both create challenges and can undermine your reputation and business. Some soft boundaries can also be harmful for the client.

Let’s start with the boundaries within the coaching session beginning with scope of coaching. As a Coach you need to have clarity about what is within your scope and this is based on two things: your experience and training as a coach and choice.

The most common issue (with regard to experience and training as a coach), arises when issues are presented to you by the client that are of a therapeutic nature. Now we could get into a discussion about where the line between therapy and coaching exists but that is a whole other can of worms (I may well write about that another day). This definition is less important than your training. Do you have the training and experience to work with deeper therapy issues? Do you have a Supervisor you can turn to for feedback, support and guidance?

Too many new Coaches fall into the trap where their desire to help their client drives them to take on something they are not equipped to deal with. This is potentially harmful for the client and you may do more harm than good.

Here is something for you to reflect on, write down the level of issues you feel you have the knowledge and training to effectively coach your client about. Give yourself an extra tick if you already have some experience in any of these areas.

Now create a list of topics that you feel would be beyond your scope. These are topics that right now you need to have a boundary about. You might consider creating a list of people you can refer clients to. This could be individuals or professional directories. If you refer to individuals I have a tip for you.

This reflection could be a great topic to discuss with your Supervisor.

Tip: Always offer the client at least three options, this creates true choice. Recommend the client speaks with each of people offered as an option and so the client can make sure they are a good fit. Avoid specifically recommending someone because if it does not go well the client may blame you. You cannot be responsible for how another coach or a therapist works. Unless you have been a client of the person you are referring to you don’t really know how they work anyway. So keep it Professional, offer the options and then advise the client have a chemistry call with each.

Let’s back the truck up a moment. Why do so many Coaches feel pressured to take on clients with issues beyond their scope?

There are three main reasons:

  1. As a Coach you care about people and you really want to help.
  2. The Client suddenly introduces a deeper topic several sessions into a coaching relationship.
  3. Income is an issue.

Let’s take each one in turn. The fact that you care about your clients is important and has a value. Your relationship with your client is incredibly healing and supportive. Carl Rogers talked about the relationship between counsellor and client being the biggest factor in helping clients. This is also true for Coaches.

Where it becomes a problem is the point where you start to take on responsibility for the client’s issues and outcomes. The chances are that some form of transference and counter transference is emerging. You may have joined a “drama triangle” (term from Transactional Analysis). Speaking to your Supervisor is the most appropriate way of untangling yourself. Regular Supervision will help deepen your self-awareness so you can learn to recognise the signs and step back quicker.

NB: The drama triangle is one of the models covered in my Transactional Analysis for Coaches CPD workshop.

When you already have an established coaching relationship and the client introduces a deeper issue you can feel like you are obligated to continue. This is not the case and may not be in your client’s best interests. When a deeper issue is offered it is important that you remind the client that it is outside your scope. You can then use the session to help the client identify where they can get the appropriate support. If the topic feels like it is on the edge of your scope you could contract with the client that you will consult your Supervisor. Depending on your experience level you may be able to expand your scope with support.

Finally, you do need to earn an income (true for most of us). That is okay and understandable. However, if you take on something beyond your scope you may end up damaging your business. Paradoxically when you are clear about boundaries this enhances your reputation in a positive way. Your client may even be more likely to recommend you.

Now, do you remember I also mentioned choice? As a Coach you can choose your scope of practice too. You may have extensive training and experience but not want to work with specific types of issue or client. This is okay, you are allowed to choose your scope of practice. This may be your niche for instance. Many of my students have a niche and a specific client type. Some only work with their preferred niche client and this is the focus of their marketing. Others may choose to take on something outside their niche from time to time but do not advertise the fact. This is choice. What is your choice of scope?

There are other boundary issues that can crop up within the session. Make a list and if you would like to discuss them do join my group on Facebook and pose your questions.

Next time I will address some of the boundary issues that are common between sessions. Do contact me direct if you have questions or comments (or join the Facebook group).

Creating Client Coaching Contracts – Part two

In my last article I laid out some basic ideas for you to start thinking about if you are a Coach, particularly a new Coach. In this article I will build further by focusing on the business aspect of your practice.

If you are a new Coach you may not have given much thought to the business aspect of the contract however this is essential if you want to be successful enough to keep working as a Coach.

I often find that new Coaches on my training programmes are uncomfortable with some of the necessary elements of creating a business. This makes sense if you think about values. You are most interested in helping others if you are drawn to coaching. This means that sometimes the business elements of the contract can feel unpleasant or be in conflict with your values.

So what am I talking about?

In particular I am talking about ‘terms and conditions”. There are several very specific things to consider:

  • How much do you charge?
  • When do you need payment?
  • What is your cancellation policy?
  • If clients don’t pay what will you do?

There are other things to consider however for right now let’s focus on this list.

Deciding what to charge is often a topic in my Supervision groups and one of the most difficult challenges if you have a value around helping others. Sometimes there is an unnecessary complex equivalent in play, e.g. charging is unkind.

I look at it another way, when a client pays for a session there is an exchange of energy. The client will be more committed to whatever outcome or action plan results from a coaching session if there is this exchange.

Does this mean you can’t do pro bono work or offer low rates for those on limited funds? Of course not. The exchange of energy can take other forms such as sharing your posts on social media.

Another aspect to consider, how are you valuing yourself? Is your reluctance to charge connected to a self-worth issue?

There are many rather alarming marketing campaigns that claim they can help you earn a 6 figure salary as a Coach. They often tap into self-worth issues and quite frankly in my option most if, not all of them, are really just scams based on pyramid selling and/or false promises and best avoided.

Here are some tips about deciding what to charge.

Firstly, what is your market sector? Are you aiming at business coaching or self-financed life coaching? The market price for these two categories can be quite different. There can be regional differences. Having said that in all sectors and all locations there will be a scale of prices on offer. There will be people charging as little as £20 through to people charging £2000.

So where do you place yourself?

I recommend that you start by writing down all the costs of the training you have received up until now. This will give you an idea of how much you have invested in yourself as this is your product. Make sure you include course fees, books, materials, travel expenses if you did face to face training and also your time.

Now you have a reminder of what the client is paying for, they are paying for your expertise, experience and time.

Do a little market research of the sector you wish to work in. You really don’t want to be the cheapest. Many people have the belief “you get what you pay for”. If you price yourself too low in the market a lot of people will be put off. Paradoxically the ones who do take it further often ask you to reduce your fees further.

If you are the most expensive coach in the area you will need to be sure your CV and marketing strategy is strong enough to draw your preferred client to you. You might want to consider pitching yourself mid-range. This will give you a comfortable income to get started with and if client’s check around they will feel they are getting a bargain if you are lower than others but high enough to signal competence.

Remember you can still have an option to offer reductions for people in real need who are cash poor. You just need to make sure this is not your fall back position with everyone.

Coaching is a trust business so when should you expect to be paid? Again this can be the cause of anxiety for many new Coaches. There are many ways you can go with this, the most important thing is to be clear about your expectations.

For example, if I work with a new client that I have not met before I usually ask for payment in advance. This tends to ensure commitment for the first session. With my regular clients I am far more relaxed.

This connects in with Cancellation policies which we will touch on again in a later article when we discuss boundaries. Sometimes we need to “teach” clients to value the time slot that has been set aside for them.

It is not uncommon for Coaching clients to cancel at the last minute or even just not turn up. This happens most often with new clients, free sessions or where payment is collected after the session.

A clear Cancellation Policy can safe guard against this. For example, full payment is appropriate for a late cancellation or a failed appointment. With the former it is too late to offer their spot to someone else and a failed appointment means you were sitting there twiddling your thumbs waiting for them to arrive!

You need to decide what you consider a late cancellation to be and you can have a sliding scale. E.g. full payment with less than 24 hours notice (2 days or 3 days or whatever you think is reasonable). Seven days notice could be 50% fee for example.

You might also want to consider what terms would be okay for a postponement.

At the end of the day the most important thing about terms and conditions is that you have some. You can post them on your website or include them on your invoices. Having terms and conditions in place means you can then choose to waive them and this will give you emotional credit with your clients. For example, if I have a client who has a genuine family emergency I will be flexible. This deepens the trust between Coach and client.

This article is really only meant to be an introduction to this topic. Do share with me your thoughts, tips and questions.

Creating Client Coaching Contracts – Part one

Although contracting is an essential part of the coaching relationship with your client many new Coaches struggle to know what to include. In this short series of articles I will share some ideas and tips to help you work out what will work for you.

In this first article let me first clarify that contracting in coaching is not really used in the legal sense of the word. If you want to have legally binding contracts you would need to consult a legal specialist.

So what is contracting in coaching?

You are basically setting up a set of agreements to ensure that your coaching is professional, effective and supports the coaching relationship. It will include on one end of the spectrum your terms and conditions and on the other agreements about the coaching relationship.

As a Coach becoming skilled at the use of contracts is essential and this is evidenced in my Supervision groups and individual Supervision sessions. The most common cause of problems for new Coaches is ineffective contracting. I remember one of my early mentors, Julie Hay stating a truism that I use today with my students:

“The work is in the Contract”

There are many elements of the contract that will remain constant throughout your coaching practice, other elements will need “tweaking” to suit a particular client.

Other elements of your contract will be co-created with your client and will be focused on the client’s situation and desired outcomes.

You may already have some great contracting frameworks that you follow and it is still worth reviewing regularly to ensure that you are maintaining best practice.

It is worth mentioning that the term “contracting” can be off putting to some clients so although we will use the term contracting here you may choose to re-frame labels. There is certainly some benefit to separating out the different types of contracting. You also need to be clear which parts of the contract are non-negotiable and which will be defined in partnership with your client.

Over the coming weeks I will include the following elements:

  • The business aspect of the contract including Terms and Conditions.
  • Professional boundaries and responsibilities.
  • The importance of multi-cornered contracts
  • The relationship contract, client’s outcomes (goals) and tasking.

 If you want to get started right away you may want to check out the websites of Association for Coaching, International Coaching Federation and European Mentoring and Coaching Council. They have a lot of great resources although you may need to be a member to access some of them.

Let me know if you have any particular questions about Contracting that you would like me to address.

Do you recognise Parallel Processes in  your Coaching sessions?

Parallel processes in your Coaching sessions are common but do you know what they are and how to recognise them?

Let’s start with a definition of parallel processing.

When a parallel process occurs a dynamic in one part of the system can be replayed in another part.

In Coaching the client may describe a problem they have with a colleague or a family member such as talking in circles for example. The client then begins doing the same behaviour with the Coach without realising it. The Coach may end up feeling the same feelings the client had described experiencing with their colleague or family member.

This is often out of awareness of the Coach and the client. As a Coach if you can learn to recognise when a parallel process presents you can begin to utilise it to help your client and as part of your own development.

The first way you can utilise it is to deepen your understanding of your client’s experience. Notice your experience, it may give you clues about what is being triggered for you client.

With this additional empathy you can ask targeted questions to help your client become self-aware. You can then help the client explore what new information they are gaining about the dynamic presented in coaching.

As a self-aware Coach you will also be role modelling how to handle the “problematic behaviour”. This is deliberate parallel processing.  In the example above of talking around in circles you can demonstrate how to focus the client back on the original topic. You might also demonstrate other approaches such as actively listening until the client runs out of steam. You could also reflect back to the client the behaviour you are noticing and bring it into their awareness as a tool for managing the process.

If you are a Supervisor you will also see many examples of parallel processing from the Coaches you Supervise.

 In Supervision the most common form of this is where the Coach unconsciously replays their client’s issue. This may cause the Coach to act toward their supervisor in the same fashion their client acted towards them. This tends to be out of awareness. The skilful Supervisor can bring the parallel process into awareness for the Coach in a way that can promote greater understanding or even transformation.

I find it useful to encourage my Coaching Students to notice parallel processing while in observer role in our Coaching Circles. It is often easier to spot this kind of thing in others. I do a similar thing when I train Supervisors.

If this topic is new to you do contact me with your questions.